The Truth about BulimiaHelp.org
When Ali told me she had bulimia, I was in shock and totally confused. My mind raced with questions. The first and most stupid one was "Well why dont you just stop?"
That was about 4 years ago and it was the start of our journey that would lead us to create BulimiaHelp.org.
We had been a couple for around three years before she told me and we were very much in love and obviously it pained me to realise she was in hurting inside. And the truth was I had absolutely no idea, she seemed so happy and confident and we spent most of our days together. I honestly thought I know everything about her.
But we were a team, she turned to me for help and that was exactly what I was going to do.
And this is where the frustration kicked in. Everywhere we searched for help we would come up against a brick wall. The same generic and frankly useless information seemed to posted everywhere.
“Its a mental illness brought on by repressed emotions”.
“You have a troubled mind”
“You cannot be cured from Bulimia”
Our Doctor just asked if she wanted Anti-Depressants. Thanks but no thanks.
But Ali wasn’t depressed, she didn’t have a messed up child hood, and was generally a pretty normal girl but yet was totally obsessed with food, calories and weight and felt compelled to throw up three times a day and no-one could give me a straight answer why?
The Truth was I honestly believed them all to be wrong. Ali was and still is the most amazing beautiful person I have ever met in my life and for someone to tell me she has a mental illness or that she was broken in some way just did not sit with me.
So we continued to research. We became experts, we read every bulimia book on the market, spent days scanning websites. We read nutrition books, biology books, researched scientific studies and soon missing pieces of the jigsaw began to fall in place.
Six months later, we had it.
I remember the day clearly when Ali and I got it. It was like a light bulb went off in our heads, what was once a mystery was now clear.
An hour later me and Ali went for Dinner and she ordered Pizza. I nearly fell off my chair. Not only did she order it but she LOVED it and did not feel frightened or compelled to purge. From that day onward she made a full and rapid recovery.
And then we thought “holy crap, have we just figured out a cure for bulimia?”
We had to share this, we decided to spread the word, we would create a website.
We built www.bulimiahelp.org, a free website offering advice, support and recovery tools. Everything we learnt was poured into it, it took us six months and all our savings. Would this work for other people? Will we get sued for saying this? we weren’t sure, but if Ali was saved, then maybe we could save someone else.
Well do you think it has worked?
Its nearly a year since the website launched and we have just under 3500 members. Many have made good progress with recovery. We are now the main referral site for many of the leading eating disorder charities globally.
But to be honest I think we could have done it a lot better. When we started out we weren’t so confident. A lot of the messages we wanted to say kind of got lost amongst all the pages in the site. We were too scared to stick our necks out totally. We didn’t want to cause any harm.
So that’s the main reason we are writing a new ebook that will cover everything in more detail and explain our process clearer, stronger and step by step. Plus we have learnt soo much setting up BulimiaHelp a year ago and want to include it all in the book. I'll keep you posted when it is ready.
As far as Bulimia Help goes, this is just the beginning, but the most important thing it is that the message is now out there, there is hope, bulimia can be beat, there is a way.
- Richard's blog
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Richy's Recovery Tips
Try NOT to feel bad if you binging and purge. Research shows that it can take a couple of months of structured eating before the binge urge disappears.
Community Tweets
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erinkraig » sitting_waiting Hey, thanks for the add! This website is very helpful and a great place for support! Feel free to message me anytime! You can do this for sure! You sound like a very motivated strong young woman! :) 3 min ago |
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kelley23 » SarahTravels I have made it 3 weeks without purging! I am still working on not overeating and bingeing. That has been so hard to stop doing. How are you doing? 57 min ago |
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sunnyleaves » eatyourheartout well done and enjoy your day! appreciate what's around you and celebrate your success in being able to see it today... take care xx 1 hour ago |
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donutseeds » mandyway88 Trying to keep it up, not working out so well!:) 2 hours ago |
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eatyourheartout feels great to wake up and start day three! I'm off for a walk to appreciate nature and all it's beauty. Something I've somehow forgotten over the last six years... 3 hours ago |
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sunnyleaves » Lauren22 hey hon - thanks for your msg : ) - sounds like you've had a good few days over all - and day 37 is amazing! i am doing better than earlier this week, so just trying to stay with that - still not purging and yesterday managed ok with eating veg / fruit in place of bread / sweets / chocolate - slowly slowly and all that... well thinking of you! hope you have a good day xx 4 hours ago |
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Featured Blog
What I learned during recovery
PLAN, PLAN, PLAN IN ADVANCE. Plan what you are going to eat during your day. What are you going to do if you are in a situation that triggers b/p. Thinking all the time about recovery is part of the eating disorder. I need to focus on the real life instead. Don’t trust yourself. If I know I always binge during an X situation (like being alone at home around 5pm), I need to go out at that time or find another activity. I am not strong enough to just be at home by myself and act normally. If I eat those cookies because I am feeling lonely they won’t make my friends appear. Trust yourself, and your body. Tell yourself you are able to do it. Tell yourself that you are not going to gain one pound because you ate a piece of cheesecake. God is an important part of my recovery If I eat tons of food, all the time, I will gain weight. I can’t have cheesecake and hamburger and fries everyday, in every meal, but I can have them once in a while. I purge not only because of my emotions, but it is an easy way to control my weight. I love food.
The information provided in this website is for information purposes only. The information on this website is NOT a substitute for proper diagnosis, treatment or the provision of advice by an appropriate health professional. Please refer to the full disclaimer and copyright. If you do think you might suffer from an eating disorder, it is important that you talk to your General Practitioner, as there are many physical complications that can arise from being at an unhealthily low weight or from losing weight very quickly, or from purging. We advise you to seek professional help with working on an eating disorder.
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thank you so much for starting this website! honestly, i don't know what i would do without it. the reason that i found bulimiahelp.org is because after a really awful binge/purge day, i was crying and feeling really helpless and lost. i googled "bulimia help" and your website popped up! it was such a blessing, because it is the only resource that is free, & provides us with a community of wonderful people who can support each other, provide advice, and gives us the tools to improve our lives. <3
RASCAL FLATTS LYRICS
"Every Day"
You could've bowed out gracefully
But you didn't
You knew enough to know
To leave well enough alone
But you wouldn't
I drive myself crazy
Tryin' to stay out of my own way
The messes that I make
But my secrets are so safe
The only one who gets me
Yeah, you get me
It's amazing to me
[CHORUS]
How every day
Every day, every day
You save my life
I come around all broken down and
Crowded out
And you're comfort
Sometimes the place I go
Is so deep and dark and desperate
I don't know, I don't know
[Repeat Chorus]
Sometimes I swear, I don't know if
I'm comin' or goin'
But you always say something
Without even knowin'
That I'm hangin' on to your words
With all of my might and it's alright
Yeah, I'm alright for one more night-
Every day
Every day, every day, every day
Every day, every day
You save me, you save me, oh, oh, oh
Every day
Every, every, every day-
Every day you save my life
linny<3
this is the best recovery based tool i have found on the net and i just want to say thanks for providing this for me..the understanding that i get from others on this website makes me feel at ease at times when all i want is understanding, but do not have the people around me to provide this.
thanks again.
I had no idea that's how this site came about to be! But hands down, this is the best recovery source I've found. A lot of other places focus so much on the emotional or mental aspects, I really didnt feel like it fit my problems. But since this web site explained the physical mechanics of binging, I've managed to actually stop my b/p cycles. A first in my many attempts at recovery!! and its all thanks to this site and everyone on here, this place is truly amazing and i cant thank you enough!! Good luck with the ebook, I'm sure it will be just as amazing and insightful and helpful as this website!
Over the past ten years I think I must have come accross almost every bulimia and eating disorder related website, both good and bad. But none of them gave me the feelings of hope that I found when this page appeared after my google search one day.
It was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I found other recovery sites impossible, I think mainly because the people there were predominatly anorexic (in my experience) which while I understand a lot about their behaviour, I just couldnt relate like I can here, often hearing stories from other recovery sites actually made me worse.
Coming here everyone is just like me! And it was and remains such a huge relief.
Learning about and using structured eating actually saved my life, I'd never been so low. So thank you, because without this site, I have no idea where any of us would be right now. x x
"..I know you don’t feel pretty, even though you are. But it wasn’t your beauty that found room in my heart.."
"..Take some time and learn to breathe, and remember what it means to feel alive and to believe something more than what you see.."
Thank you!! This site has helped me waaay more than therapy, books & workbooks and other recovery methods I've tried.
You are amazing people and I am hopeful for recovery because you've shown that it is possible!
I'd like to thank my amazing partner Richy... soon husband-to-be and now father of our 3 week old baby... for all his support over the years and for being such a great finace! Richy is the main spark behind Bulimia Help, not only has he built such a great site from scratch, he is always thinking of ways to improve and offer more help to all our members. In fact he dedicates everything into it and is currently working very hard building a great e-book in between helping me out change dirty nappies! He's multi-skilled to say the least :D It is truly brilliant that he has now stepped out from behind the scenes into the limelight. If it was not for Richy's dedication to stand by me and really figure out a recovery method that works, I know I would still be living in the vicious cycle that once took control of my every move. Richy you deserve a medal, you saved my life and are now saving the lives of many others! I love you very much, you are the perfect husband and you are a truly brilliant father, xxx Ali :)
Ali Kerr
Co Founder Bulimia Help
Recovery is possible!
You seriously made me want to cry (in a good way) :)
Massive congratulations on the birth of your baby, I really wish you both all the happiness in the world, I'd give you both a medal too if I could!x x
"..I know you don’t feel pretty, even though you are. But it wasn’t your beauty that found room in my heart.."
"..Take some time and learn to breathe, and remember what it means to feel alive and to believe something more than what you see.."
This Site really helped me A LOT
I'm looking forward to the e-book. I'm sure it will help many people with there recovery!
And also; congratulations on the birth of your baby. Even if i don't know you much, i'm really happy for you. I'm sure you'll be great parents.
Thank you this is day one for me and I can't get off the site because I am alone in the house and I am unsure what I will do. That is not true I know what I will do. Now I don't feel like this is just me, so many people have the same issues as I do I can't believe as I read the blogs how many of us are feeling the same. Thank you Thank you Thank you. I now have hope