Latest Status Updates
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bluestickienotes99 » shotgunxsinner7 I had a major breakdown for one day. I just went home and cried. I had to tell myself over and over that I was fine the way I was.Try to take a nap or a hot shower. Relax and just keep telling yourself that their opinions don't matter and are completely wrong. Because they are completely wrong. 57 min ago |
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shotgunxsinner7 » bluestickienotes99 How did you handle it over the summer??? I cant stop thinking about it. It plays like a clip video over and over again. 1 hour ago |
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Peanersss Day two, harder then day one....now i remember why i always relapse...Emotional wreck 1 hour ago |
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bluestickienotes99 » shotgunxsinner7 OMG! Never go back to that doctor again! I would have walked out! That is completely uncalled for! 1 hour ago |
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shotgunxsinner7 » bluestickienotes99 I told the nurse not to let me know the number. She freaking tells me. Then the doctor saw I was crying, I told him I had an eating disorder, and tells me "Well you're not that thin, so it shouldn't be a problem" and started giving me diet advice. 1 hour ago |
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bluestickienotes99 » shotgunxsinner7 you should have told him to go screw himself! A doctor told me that over the summer and my mom jumped all over her! 1 hour ago |
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shotgunxsinner7 has been crying for HOURS since the doctor weighed me (and freaking told me I could lose about 30lbs!). I'm sorry, but I cannot continue recovery at this weight if I'm going to continue to gain. You you lovely folks in two months when I'm ready again. 1 hour ago |
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rawkstar05 » SarahTravels I also have started to journal, I have found that it helps me keep busy but not ignore whats going on inside my head, cause when you ignore it it seems to get worse, I don't know it that makes me sound crazy or not. 2 hours ago |
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rawkstar05 » eatyourheartout 4 days! Way to go! Stay Strong 2 hours ago |
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rawkstar05 » bluestickienotes99 You can do it! Stay Strong 2 hours ago |
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rawkstar05 » SarahTravels Hey, a few things I do to keep myself busy are dancing/singing (I just blare a song in my room and rock out...lol), I recently have started to clean my room, and organize random items. I'm hoping the weather gets nice pretty soon so I can go and take a walk or do things outside (getting out of my house where the food is). Usually its best if I can stay busy so I don't binge, cause when I do its so hard to concentrate on anything its just a voice screaming in my head to purge. Hope this helps... 2 hours ago |
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eatyourheartout has four days b/p free underneath her belt! that's about the longest time in the past two months...going away for the weekend with friends. wish me luck!! 2 hours ago |
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prissjo » Ata.Mai Omg... im so sorry for you :S but im really glad you are doing better and that for once, your mom took care of you... :( I wish I could help! Did anything triggered that situation? Lately I feel like I cant do this... i am really sick of the "back to day1" syndrom. I cant go 3 days in a row without b/p'ing... And its such a vicious circle because I hate the way I look right now (b/p side effects) and it triggers me to b/p even more. Anyway, I hope your doing better and im proud of you for not purging :)!! take care beautiful xx 3 hours ago |
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junedancer06 Thanks I appreciate the support! 4 hours ago |
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clintskitten I have been feeling very good today, I think the new medication they have me on is starting to work :) 5 hours ago |
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bluestickienotes99 is starting recovery tomorrow. I'm sick of my own lame excuses and b/p all day. I need to make real effort. This is not easy. 5 hours ago |
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kelley23 » SarahTravels Thanks! I am still struggling with the overeating and bingeing. It is nothing compared to how much I would eat when I knew I was going to purge though. I just think it is discouraging to still be struggling with it. I know I am not going to get out of it overnight but I just get so tired of everything being such a struggle. Hopefully as my interest grow I will be able to start focusing my attention on other things besides food. Overall I am doing better but it has been a battle to stay in recovery. 6 hours ago |
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amywishy » letgoandletgod hey yeah doing much better. Can i have your advice, i have given up bread chocolate and crisps for lent but still havent lost any weight could you give any advice as to why lol x 6 hours ago |
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so_done_with_this and there she goes...why is day one the freakin hardest sometimes?? ugh... 7 hours ago |
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c8lin89 » freakyblonde88 is almost over thats a whole 2 weeks without doing it! THATS AMAZING. keep going i believe in youuu!!! : ) xoxox have a great night darling 7 hours ago |
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c8lin89 » freakyblonde88 oh i totally know how you feel!! and the worst part is my mom mentioned AGAIN that she knows ive still been bping even after she talked to me about it. soo now that im home theres no way i can do it without her knowing! i guess thats good. and also she offered to pay for counseling which is good because i was worried about that. but now thats a relief and another step towards recovery! im SOO PROUD that you held it in and stayed strong!! chinese food is so hard to resist for me too! but you did it! be proud of yourself and keep it up!! day 14 8 hours ago |
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c8lin89 » kolb13 does anyone know about it? id be so scared if my boyfriend ever found out! i dont think hed look at me the same way or might leave me. so im scared to talk to him about it... maybe i will eventually. but hte good thing about my mom knowing is that she offered to pay for my counseling which is a good thing since i was worried about that!! so im relieved a little bit i guess. but how have you been today?/ i hope your doin well girl! keep me updated love! stay stronggg xoxox 8 hours ago |
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c8lin89 » kolb13 yeah i totally understand what you mean its like i can go one day without doing it but then the next day is too hard to resist. its soo annoying! but i think they have known for awhile but its just becoming worse and they have noticed it a lot more recently. in fact, my mom talked to me AGAIN today because shes noticed ive still been doin it even after she talked to me and i said i wouldn't. its so annoying because it just makes me feel so shitty and gross. and i hate that im hurting them because im so selfish. but so your parents dont know ? 8 hours ago |
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charlie22 so low and needing help 2day 8 hours ago |
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mariemae » evamarie It is sick that we do this to ourselves but I try to remember that ED is acting out for me because I can't or don't know how in a healthy way. That is my dream ..to learn positive coping skills and know you will too. Take care of yourself- 8 hours ago |
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lauren1234 » FlowersBloomForHim hi thanks for your kind reply. im glad there is someone out there who knows how i feel!! i just feel i cant talk to anyone because they dont understand how i feel they can only pretend they know!. iv got an action plan so hopefully be able to stick to it!! aww i hope you recover from hospital!! x 8 hours ago |
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bluestickienotes99 wonders what normal actually is. 9 hours ago |
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freakyblonde88 » c8lin89 good time with your bf, it does help to have them around... ;-) Keep fighting though, If I can make it 2weeks, so can you.. I had a baaaaaaaad case of the baddies.. :-P So it's possible for anyone... I hope I don't binge at work tomorrow aswell... :-? ugh.. keep up the fight... luv ya.. xoxoxo 9 hours ago |
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freakyblonde88 » c8lin89 so nice to get a msg from you right now, My stomach is stuffed with chinese food, we didn't have anything planned to celebrate our 11months together cause I was working tonight.. Working at a chinese restaurant with a buffé sucks! as chinese is a major binge trigger for me.. If I had it "my" way I'd have my head in the toilet right now. but no way! I already came this far, and already gained all the bad weight, not screwing it up now... I'm trying to tell myself this one time won't make anything worse. I sure hope so. Happy to hear you had a .. 9 hours ago |
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freakyblonde88 Binged on Chinese food at work... I'm having a struggle with the toilet.. but I know I'm gonna win!! That's two weeks purge free... ;-) 9 hours ago |
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firestorm » chem_nerd CROSSED!! Love you, keep us updated! <3! 9 hours ago |
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firestorm » charlie1 I'm officially worried. Love love, hope you're ok. <3 9 hours ago |
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c8lin89 » VeganPrincess lately i havent gone more than 4 or 5 days without doing it. when i first went to college i stopped my freshman year because it was impossible in the dorms without someone noticing, but i also just didnt eat in general. i lost a lottt of weight and was really unhealthy and when i got my own apartment, it started back up slowly again and now its just really bad :/ how long have you gone? and how long have you had this ED? well i hope youve been well love!!! let me know how your day went : ) xoox 10 hours ago |
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c8lin89 » VeganPrincess yeah i know me too! its like i feel amazing when im not bping and i feel like i can make it last and never go back ... but i always do and then i feel so shitty about myself and think that since i already fucked up, i might as well just keep doin it. its such a weird way of thinking i know. and your right, hopefully knowing my parents know about it now can help in my recovery because i wanna get better for myself as well as for all of them too! i dont wanna hurt anyone else by this ed, i already hurt myself enough. does anyone know about yours 10 hours ago |
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chem_nerd my dad called me today. said the government has received all the information about the insurance stuff, and we should hear something next week. Please keep your fingers crossed that I get approved so I can go inpatient. 10 hours ago |
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bluestickienotes99 » shotgunxsinner7 I had a major breakdown for one day. I just went home and cried. I had to tell myself over and over that I was fine the way I was.Try to take a nap or a hot shower. Relax and just keep telling yourself that their opinions don't matter and are completely wrong. Because they are completely wrong. 57 min ago |
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shotgunxsinner7 » bluestickienotes99 How did you handle it over the summer??? I cant stop thinking about it. It plays like a clip video over and over again. 1 hour ago |
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Peanersss Day two, harder then day one....now i remember why i always relapse...Emotional wreck 1 hour ago |
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bluestickienotes99 » shotgunxsinner7 OMG! Never go back to that doctor again! I would have walked out! That is completely uncalled for! 1 hour ago |
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shotgunxsinner7 » bluestickienotes99 I told the nurse not to let me know the number. She freaking tells me. Then the doctor saw I was crying, I told him I had an eating disorder, and tells me "Well you're not that thin, so it shouldn't be a problem" and started giving me diet advice. 1 hour ago |
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bluestickienotes99 » shotgunxsinner7 you should have told him to go screw himself! A doctor told me that over the summer and my mom jumped all over her! 1 hour ago |
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What I learned during recovery
PLAN, PLAN, PLAN IN ADVANCE. Plan what you are going to eat during your day. What are you going to do if you are in a situation that triggers b/p. Thinking all the time about recovery is part of the eating disorder. I need to focus on the real life instead. Don’t trust yourself. If I know I always binge during an X situation (like being alone at home around 5pm), I need to go out at that time or find another activity. I am not strong enough to just be at home by myself and act normally. If I eat those cookies because I am feeling lonely they won’t make my friends appear. Trust yourself, and your body. Tell yourself you are able to do it. Tell yourself that you are not going to gain one pound because you ate a piece of cheesecake. God is an important part of my recovery If I eat tons of food, all the time, I will gain weight. I can’t have cheesecake and hamburger and fries everyday, in every meal, but I can have them once in a while. I purge not only because of my emotions, but it is an easy way to control my weight. I love food.
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